(probably more likely - right?) and you hear a voice
on the other end say:
"Hey (insert your name here-----) listen, I know youdon't believe in me, but this is Satan...yeah, I know
you're shocked, you think it's a prank...it's not,
this is me, the Devil."
You're trying to recognize the voice-
you know it's some whacked out
friend who's lost their mind, temporarily,
but you say: "Sure, yup, got it."
Because you are really wondering, "what?"
And the voice goes on...
"It's a shock, look, (insert your name) you
are just one of thousands of calls I have to
make, because, goodness, you've done such
a fantastic job, I just wanted to say thank you."
Now you know, this is jive...
Your brain rejects this as anything but a
hoax, and you begin to get a little pissed
at the idea that somebody would call you
with such an obvious load of crap,
so you don't say anything, and he continues:
"Get past it, this isn't a prank, it's really
me."
"Aw c'mon, why would you..."
"You don't listen real well, but then
I knew that, we've been laughing at the
non sense you pull, well, for (insert
your age) years, you've provided us more
than we could purchase on the Rio or
Vegas, and we don't even have to worry
about the Paparazzi!"
O.K., that does it, you know it's (insert
the name of a dude who pulls practical
jokes, here) he's been to Vegas...that's
the tell (tell- a give away... Google it...)
"Look you can quit it (jokers name) it's
not gonna work, I know its you." That
sounded pretty good.
"Yeah I hear it in your voice, you really
don't believe it's me, that's cool, you'll
catch on here in a few."
Your cell phone gets very hot...your
about to put it down, damn thing is
burning...and, whoosh, it goes cold.
His laughter bursts off it, loudly, and
the lights in the room go bright and
then dim. Your shoes go tight, very
tight, it's almost painful, then, once
again, whoosh, they aren't?
"You're right, that's sort of hard to
believe, but those are just to help
you get it. I really want you to feel
my thanks. I'm being totally sincere
here, you have done a wonderful job."
Oh, you want to ask, but if you do?
"You have denied, stalled, acted like
it didn't matter, and you've helped
your friends do the same, and so,
here we are, the whole human race
is about to go- I win, and I love it,
and I want to thank you."
That's it, you hit the END button.
You're half expecting it to stay on,
but it doesn't. Now what?
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